Sunday, March 31, 2013

Leadership Tips for Husbands - Part 4



5. Remain Calm and be Slow to Anger 

"He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city." - Proverbs 16:32 

Just as there are attributes in women that men find attractive, women are attracted to a man that is cool, calm, and in control. Losing your temper quickly and becoming angry will only cause your wife to resent you and be less likely to obey.

6. Stop Arguing and Trying to Prove that You are Right 

"The beginning of strife is as when one letteth out water: therefore leave off contention, before it be meddled with." - Proverbs 17:14

When you feel the need to argue with your wife in order to prove to her that you are right, you are sending her a message that says, "Obey me because I am right." That implies that she only needs to obey you when she thinks that your are right. The message that you should be sending your wife is, "Obey me because I am the boss." Tell your wife how things will be, stand your ground, and do not allow yourself to be drawn into an argument. If necessary, change the subject, or find another way to politely end the conversation.

"Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." - Ephesians 5:24

To Be Continued...

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Time for the next post...

Anonymous said...

Time for the next daily post...

Argon Family said...

Very good, Pastor A. Keep it up! :)

Anonymous said...

Wow. Marriage is a partnership. Not a sexist dictatorship. If my husband ever claimed to be the "boss" of me, I would mostly just laugh.

Anonymous said...

We are newly saved Christians (about 2 years now). I was raised an atheist. I am so thankful for the Lord coming into show me the truth and my husband. I found this series after watching some of your online sermons. We really have no community to speak of. We know one other family who believes what we do. So I appreciate your postings. I agree with most everything you say.

Needless to say, we have spent the last five years or so, rethinking everything we thought we knew. As a wife, I truly do want my husband to lead. But, I don't completely agree with #6. I really believe that part of leading is being right. Otherwise, as a follower, I begin to lose faith in my husband. And if I'm not able to speak openly and respectfully, I begin to feel as if I don't matter. Intimacy is lost. And love motivates much more than fear or control. I imagine it would be very hard as a leader to allow yourself to be vulnerable, but I think it is absolutely necessary to prove your competency at times. Also admitting when you've been wrong. This allows for a depth of connection. And as a follower, I need this depth.

Anonymous said...

Also, what about Isaiah 1:18 "Come let us reason together..." What does God model for us? He doesn't ask us to blindly follow His authority, He asks us to reason with Him.

AcculturatedHousewife said...

Lol at anonymous that would laugh at her husband. Being submissive isn't a bad thing. And the Bible never portrays it as being a negative thing. It's a very loving thing that allows two people to flow fluidly together in a beautiful partnership. Of course there's always the dummy that thinks by being the head of his house he can abuse his wife and family, but that guy isn't reading his Bible-- he's just using bits and pieces of Scripture to be a jerk. A husband that is head of his house is no one's boss, he's a leader. Truthfully, my husband is such a great leader that I would follow him anywhere. To lead is to love, without it you cannot call on others. Kind of like Jesus :)